Yesterday was a hard day. I live with a chronic illness – rheumatoid arthritis – mostly it is invisible – yesterday it wasn’t. My hands got swollen and red and it was hard to do much. So I didn’t. It was what my body needed to rest. So I did.
The Advent word for yesterday was embrace. I realized that I needed to embrace where I was at the point. When I am in pain it is hard for me to feel hopeful, it is hard for me to find the faith that life will get better. What I said on my Instagram post was ‘this hand will embrace hope even when it is hard’. It is hard work embracing hope, when all around you see darkness, despair and you have no idea how to keep going.
I am going to work on embracing hope even when it doesn’t seem worthwhile to do so. For tomorrow often brings a new perspective and sheds a new light on a difficult situation. It doesn’t mean that I will stop caring for myself, because I have to otherwise I just stop functioning. It does mean that when I get to those moments of darkness I will remember that embracing hope may be the only thing I can do. Embrace what you need to, to get you through the hard moments, days, nights. With you I will remember that God came to us in the midst of great darkness, to give us hope to embrace and to make faith that much richer.