Faith from the Edges

Faith and life from the perspective of me.

Archive for the month “April, 2013”

Anniversary Day

WeddingDay

27 years ago today the dear one and I got married. It has been quite the ride. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. So today I am sharing with everyone the good news that marriage works, that it is worthwhile, that I have been blessed because the dear one loves me and that our relationship has been a blessing for others. Today I am going to gush because I got the best man for me and I am thankful that love still shines between us.

Happy Anniversary my love!

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Work??

Here’s some of what I know that I am good at:

  • I am good with children. I love them and they seem to know that.
  • I am a good writer.
  • I have organizing skills.
  • I can find my way around even the most complicated government of Canada website (and most of those are complicated, who designs them anyways) and lots of other internet places as well.
  • I am a good communicator and I am good with social media -been learning how to use it for good purposes.
  • I love art and love making crafty things with children.
  • I know how to share my faith with others.
  • I am passionate about justice issues and how to make the world a better place.

Now you may be wondering why I am making a list like the above and sharing it with you my reader. I know that many of you will say, well duh Fiona we knew that already. Here’s the thing I am needing to remind myself of that list at the moment. I am pondering what is next for me. What is my place within the church and within the working world? Where can my God given gifts be best put to use?

work

I am looking for a job that will allow those gifts to be used and to be understood as a blessing to those that I work with and for. I am putting it out there to the world that I am ready and willing to go back to work but I want, no need, for it to be work that improves the world and is not just work for work’s sake.

I am going to keep looking, pondering and dreaming about my future work. I am going to keep asking God what that work is supposed to look like. I am going to keep writing and asking the hard questions. I am going to keep looking for good work.

What does work mean for you?

Time out

time-out-bench1

I have given myself a time out today. I was really, really grumpy with the dear one this morning and I told him take the van and he said what about church and I said I am not coming. I got my buttons pushed this morning and I got angry, really angry. So yep, I am on a time out. I needed to be by myself and calm down. Ever been there?

It isn’t that important as to what pushed my buttons this morning what is important is that I let them get pushed and then I pushed them so more. I forgot to take a step back and breathe, so that I could remember that the dear one loves me and that I love him. I am immensely grateful for that love but you wouldn’t have known it by how grumpy I was this morning. I don’t really like myself when I get that angry, I am not a nice person then and I take it out on the people that I love the most. As I used to tell my children when they got like that when they were little it is time out for you – in this case me.

I am going to work on remembering this the next someone or something pushes my buttons, that I need to breathe, walk away and take a time out. That I need to do that before things to get out of control, or as in this case I get out of control. I want to find ways to express my discontent or disagreement without having to yell it at the top of my lungs. I want to be the person that I know I am called to be. I am not going to give up my anger I just don’t want it to control how I behave in the moment that I am angry. To get there I am going to need to give myself more time outs to breathe and remember my better self and how I want to really be in with those I love dearly, especially the dear one.

Living out a life of faith is not easy and learning how to be a better human being is not easy. You would think in my middle years that I would have much of this sorted but I am still working on it. Likely that I will be working on it until I can’t remember that I need to be working on it.

I am going to take a time out when I need it and remember that I am a better human being than my anger makes me. Blessings to you all as work on whatever you need to work on in your life.

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